Relationships books & resources

The following is a list of recommended books and resources about relationships. The Location(s) available column shows where these books are available, eg, from your local Christchurch City Library (CCL) and/or from the Mental Health Education and Resource Centre (MHERC).

Books can be reserved online and checked out by visiting CCL or MHERC. If a book is not available, a librarian may be able to suggest another book or place a hold on a book. To borrow or place a hold on a book, you must be a member of the library. MHERC can post books and other resources out to its users, including those living in rural areas, and will include a post-paid bag for returning books. Once read, books need to be returned to the library.

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Cover
Title & Author
Description
Year
Location(s) available

Why Won’t You Apologize?

By Harriet Lerner

Year: 2017

Subject: Interpersonal relationships

In this text, Harriet Lerner challenges the popular notion that forgiveness is the only path to peace of mind and helps those who have been injured to resist pressure to forgive too easily.

2017

Location

CCL

 

Cain’s Legacy

By Jeanne Safer

Year: 2012

Subject: Families, brothers and sisters

Safer explores the roots of inter-sibling woes, and provides compassionate guidance to brothers and sisters whose relationship is broken. She reveals how they can come to terms with the one peer relationship they can never sever even if they never see each other again

2012

Location

CCL

 

Boundaries

By Henry Cloud

Year: 2017

Subject: Conduct of life

This New York Times bestselling and award-winning book helps readers set healthy boundaries in order to be the loving people God created, and now offers a whole new chapter. Are you in control of your life? Christians often focus so much on being loving and giving that they forget their own limits and limitations. Have you ever found yourself wondering: Can I set limits and still be a loving person? How do I answer someone who wants my time, love, energy, or money? Why do I feel guilty when I consider setting boundaries? In this Gold Medallion Award-winning book and New York Times bestseller, Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend give you biblically based answers to these.

2017

Location

CCL

 

The Dance of Intimacy

By Harriet Lerner

Year: 1989

Subject: Interpersonal relationships

Points out and discusses problems of intimacy in family and partner relationships with suggestions of steps that can be taken to build solid and respectful relationships.

1989

Location

CCL

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work

By John Gottman

Year: 2016

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work has revolutionized the way we understand, repair, and strengthen marriages. John Gottman’s unprecedented study of couples over a period of years has allowed him to observe the habits that can make and break a marriage. Here is the culmination of that work: the seven principles that guide couples on a path toward a harmonious and long-lasting relationship. Straightforward yet profound, these principles teach partners new approaches for resolving conflicts, creating new common ground, and achieving greater levels of intimacy. Gottman offers strategies and resources to help couples collaborate more effectively to resolve any problem, whether dealing with issues related to sex, money, religion, work, family, or anything else.Packed with new exercises and the latest research out of the esteemed Gottman Institute, this revised edition of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the definitive guide for anyone who wants their relationship to attain its highest potential.

2016

Location

CCL

MHERC

SL

Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform your Sex Life

By Emily Nagoski

Year: 2015

An essential exploration of women’s sexuality that will radically transform your sex life into one filled with confidence and joy. Researchers have spent the last decade trying to develop a ‘pink pill’ for women that would function like Viagra does for men. So where is it? Well, for reasons this book makes crystal clear, that pill will never exist but, as a result of the research that’s gone into it, scientists have learned more about how women’s sexuality works than we ever thought possible, and Come as You Are explains it all. The first lesson in this essential, transformative book is that every woman has her own unique sexuality, like a fingerprint, and that women vary more than men in our anatomy, our sexual response mechanisms, and the way our bodies respond to the sexual world. So we never need to judge ourselves based on others’ experiences because women vary, and that’s normal. Second lesson: sex happens in a context. And all the complications of everyday life influence the context surrounding a woman’s arousal, desire, and orgasm. The most important factor for women, in creating and sustaining a fulfilling sex life, is not what you do in bed, but how you feel about it which means that stress, mood, trust, and body image are central factors in a woman’s sexual wellbeing. Once you understand these factors, you can create for yourself better sex and more profound pleasure than you ever thought possible.

2015

Location

CCL

SL